So this goes out to one of my blood brothers(Another tribute to Iron Maiden and Springsteen) Ankit Saxena. For this epic I will be calling on the services of Avinash(Really must think of a cooler name for him), Punky, Suji. He is known as sexy, Saxena and any permutation on the S word.
The standard disclaimer of everything being under exaggerated and nothing being coincidental still hold of course. This time around I have an excuse to write this piece which is our batch's yearbook(This is apparently someone's twisted idea to ensure that everyone has an excuse to write about someone else)
So if God were to Saxena this is what he would say "Ok Black Water and Park, Give him brains, Yeah that amount should be fine. Now make him short no not that short you morons aah its perfect now. Now make him addicted to playing games and nagraj comics. What do you mean he doesn't look it. Do what I am telling you. I am god and you are supposed to listen to me"
Saxena is a chameleon so to speak. If there is one person who has changed by the end of first year it has to Mr Saxena. Suji tells of an incident wherein he was tell a few jokes and he promptly proceeded to bore them to death(Of course this was because the seniors were expecting something totally different from what Saxena narrated) . Once while Saxena was being ragged he was totally oblivious to the taunts of the seniors and escaped without saying anything. Come second year and Saxena totally transforms. He was the scourge of terror frightening and scaring juniors with his mere presence.
Saxena is also an excellent player of Phatta. He is one of the shortest and fastest bowlers on campus. As a batsmen Drake feels that he plays the ball extremely late simply to annoy the poor bowler. Just when the ball is about to hit the stumps the bat comes down and the ball disappears.
Another of Saxena's striking characteristics was to take advice from our Student Guide(He is the one who is supposed to take of care of a group of freshers who come to IIT Kanpur) and then do the complete opposite. Case in point being when he and me took a Thermodynamics course because our Student Guide asked us to take some other course.
One of the happiest days in Drake's life was when Saxena got a Sarkari job. He simply fits the part and as Forrest(from Forrest Gump) Sarkari Naukri and Saxena are like peas and carrots. We at the SPO thought thought that the interviewer must have glimpsed himself during his college days the moment Saxena walked in.
Though Saxena has a Sarkari naukri and doesn't look it he is a gamer par excellence. He has been credited with finishing many FPS games(Those games wherein you feel you are shooting many people by sneaking around behind trees and bushes using just your mouse as an agent of destruction). He is also an unabashed Nagraj, Dhruv fan and has practically story and trait pertaining to these two characters(There might be more actually) on his fingertips.
Saxena also revels in GPL's. It is here that one begins to see the destructive side in this otherwise docile being. Indeed he can be seen with chappal in hand beating the living hell out of anyone who might be unlucky enough to have a birthday.
Saxena is also the saviour of the Electrical Engineering Department. He has been credited by Punky, Rusty, Avinash, suji as their source of assignments. Indeed it is not an uncommon sight to see swarms of EE students around Saxena's room during an assignment submission or before an exam.
Another of Saxena's fascinations concerns old films and their leading ladies in particular. He was once spotted by Suji and Avinash as having paused a scene during Jewel Thief(This was one of those Dev Anand Movies) and being in an extremely compromising position.
Drake Frederick on Saxena
"Fuck, GPL lene aa gaya"
"Fuck, Saxena is watching Jewel Thief"
"Aur be padhai ke ilava aur kya kya karte ho"(Saxena to first years)
"Yeh khana acha hai"(During some meals at Gyan Vaishnav)