This one goes out to Mrigank Gupta aka Murgi. Murgi is such an awesome dude that even Chuck Norris and Rajnikanth can’t hold a candle to him. Below are Some facts that are indeed facts
When Murgi was an infant he changed his own diapers
Murgi was born toilet trained
Murgi is actually the eldest in his house. He let the others enter this world before him
When Murgi was born he got his own birth certificate from the doctor’s office
Murgi never sits idle. He is just pretending to be like us
Murgi never listens to excuses on the phone. He simply tells you what to do and disconnects.
When Murgi will finally take a vacation the world will stop spinning
While Chuck Norris counted to infinity twice, Murgi had already finished counting thrice and was solving everyone else's problems.
Natural selection does not apply to Murgi. (Courtesy Ikka)
Murgi caught an electron at rest.(Courtesy Ikka)
When Arthur Eddington was asked if he really believed there were just three people in the world who understood General Relativity, and he wondered who the third one was, the two he had in mind were Murgi and Einstein. (Courtesy Ikka)
Murgi taught all the birds, how to fly (Courtesy Pravin Gangwar aka Gangu)
Jadoo didn't come to earth from krypton by some hyper speed rocket. It was Murgi who flew across galaxies and covered light years to save him and brought him to earth (Courtesy Gangu)
Murgi knows the answer to the question, "Why did the Murgi cross the road?" (Courtesy Chintoo)
When Murgi got a BC, Mech DUGC crapped his pants (Courtesy Nitish Nana)
When Murgi simulates flow of Complex Fluids they all behave as Simple fluids (Courtesy Nana)
Murgi never lets a good deed go unpunished. He thanks everyone for contributing to fun facts
Add more in the comments.